“Life With Chronic Illness For Healthy People So Some Bad-Flare-Day Chronic-Crusader Doesn’t Lose It On You For No Good Reason!”

 Good morning! Hey, are you guys sitting down? Because I discovered something yesterday that blew my friggin’ mind! You’re NEVER gonna believe this but…there are people in this world who aren’t chronically illin’! SERIOUSLY! (And you know what else? I’m a giant DORK!)

*See bottom for explaination

 OK, I’ll try to compose myself a bit and explain my epiphany…Most of us who live with chronic illness (Please, don’t leave yet all you healthy peoples! I SWEAR I have a good point!) have seen all the little posters and memes (not to mention hilarious YouTube videos) about things you shouldn’t say to a sick person, but has anyone ever seen one that explains to non-illin’ folks WHY they shouldn’t say them?

 Think about it a minute…we’ve all probably tried to some degree or another to explain these things to our friends and family we deal with on a daily basis. But what about new friends? What about casual acquaintances? The ones who aren’t privy to our inner battles and daily pain. They may be “clueless” as to what they should or shouldn’t say, but I can pretty much guarantee they’ll feel the weight of our anger if they slip up and utter one of the many taboo phrases…

 So here’s the thing a friend pointed out yesterday, “...we all have to remember a few things...people cannot properly relate to a disease or condition unless they have either had it themselves or lived with a loved one who had the condition…” And she’s completely right! (I just occasionally forget that my mental telepathy that imparts “all info required” doesn’t work on everyone! )

 So today I’m gonna give a short (yah, right!) primer on “Life With Chronic Illness For Healthy People So Some Bad-Flare-Day Chronic-Crusader Doesn’t Lose It On You For No Good Reason!” (Short? Yep…just look at the title. I’m REALLY off to a good start!)

 Stress, exercise, and vitamin supplements…Yes, stress will make ANY condition worse. It triggers all sorts of chemical reactions in your body that kick your arse. That’s just a fact! Yes, exercise is good for you. It strengthens your immune system, improves circulation, and releases happy endorphins. Yes, vitamins are good for pitching in when you’re not eating right (which we should be doing anyway) and filling in the blank spots in our store-houses of Daily Requirement.

 But…if you have an Autoimmune that affects your muscles (Polymyositis or Dermatomyositis) or joints (Rheumatoid Arthritis) then some exercises can do more harm than good. That’s why most of these folks (including myself) will at some point work with a Physical Therapist to create a program that’s tailored to their bodies and needs. Exercise will help keep us limber and functional, but it will NOT cure us or even necessarily slow the progression of the disease.    

 Vitamins and supplements are great! Quite a few Autoimmunes have been linked to Vitamin D deficiencies. (I take a Doc prescribed 5000 Units of Vitamin D daily.)   On the other hand, there are many supplements that interact with our Doc prescribed meds that we need to avoid. (Trust me on this; if we’re doing our job of staying on top of our health, we’re well aware of what’s good for us and what’s not.)

 There are so many other things that can accidentally trigger a “Hulk smash!” response that I could write for DAYS about it…(but I won’t. *grin*) So let me just sum-up the biggies like this…If you don’t know what to say, ASK. If you know someone who’s been sick and somehow achieved remission, “ask” if it’s a similar situation instead of “telling” the person what they should do to get to that point.

 If you remember reading some great articles on the subject, ASK the person if they’d like you to send them the info instead of just assuming. (Chances are, if it’s out there, they’ve read it anyway.)

 Don’t EVER tell them how lucky they are to either not need to work or to be able to nap all day and watch TV in bed. THAT my friends? Is the quickest way to achieve instant “persona non grata” status. Do not pass "Go," do not collect $2oo!

 Also? It’s safest just to avoid ANY and ALL discussions of pain, unless the illin’ guy starts it. (Then all bets are off and it’s his fault if he gets bent outta shape *evil grin*.) Most chronic individuals do live with some type of chronic pain. (And it sucks!) And the difference between your sprain, strain, break, twist, or contusion? Chronic pain NEVER stops! The constant barrage on your nervous system wears you the friggin’ heck out! It becomes distracting, causing the infamous “brain fog” and perpetual state of confused agravation.

 Oh, and most of our meds? Understand all our pretty little pills and mysterious injections and infusions will never cure us. These drugs are used to control as best as Modern Medical Science can, our symptoms and do their best to halt the progression of the disease. And they ALL come with side-effects attached! So, it more or less becomes a trade-off to maintain our quality of life.

 And, to wind things up, I will present to you the Great Grand-Daddy of them all, the uber DO NOT SAY phrase that makes just about all of us want to enter primal-scream mode…(It can take one of two forms here…) “But you don’t look sick.” or, “But you look good.” Instead, you best bet is just say, “Hi!” *takes a bow at own wittiness*

 Seriously though, if you ever find yourself face-to-face with one of these un-tamed, chronically ill creatures and you’re not sure how to proceed out of fear and trepidation…treat them like you would any “normal” person. And if all else fails, just ask…(or run.) *insert unexplainable giggle fit here* (I’ll blame it on the meds!)

 May your day be filled with understanding, tolerance, compassion, and a distinct lack of misunderstandings!

*The title of this is “You Saved Me.” The idea was life is never easy. The person on the bank took the hard way to their goal instead of the well-lit path. But, by taking the harder journey, they were where they needed to be to offer a much-needed hand to the person “drowning” in their life.

We may each have our own paths to travel, whether we take the easy road or the one riddled with obstacles. Only by helping each other, whether it’s a physical hand or a metaphorical hand of understanding…only then can we truly “save” each other and find our own peace and happiness.