Good morning! First off, thank you so much for all the love and support yesterday. You guys are amazingly AWESOME! Thanks to your kind words (and a switch-up in the pain meds by the Doc) I'm feeling WAY better today. *deep happy sigh*
So...a few days ago while I was at the mall with my daughter, I realized a little girl who probably two or three, was staring at me. What the fudge-monkeys? Then it hit me like a bag of wet corn flakes…we were wearing the same outfit, complete with matching piggy-tails. WOW!
|Hey...my mis-matched nails and|
(In a slightly toddler-like way...)
It was an eye-opener for me. In that instant, I understood just how much of a big kid I really am! Then, the thoughts about why I hadn’t become a real, true grown-up began taking a leisurely stroll through my brain. Should I grow up? Should I make more of an effort to become a mature, responsible adult-type person?
I shivered like a bald-butted penguin sitting on an iceberg at the thought! I shuddered as violently as I did the time my fuzzy-bottomed youngest accidentally mooned me! (Please, don’t ask. I’m STILL traumatized!)
So today, the Friday Top Ten is just a few of the MANY reasons I came up with why I refuse to grow up! (I'm sorry, but the whole concept scare the Batman-style explicatives right outta me!)
Top Ten Reasons I Won’t Ever Grow Up! (OR, Stuff Grown-Ups Don’t Do, So They Become WAY Too Boring!)
1) If I grew up, I would have to paint my nails all one color. I mean, when was the last time you saw Barbara Walters with mis-matched nail polish, let alone nails covered in fairy sparkles?
I plan on being 80 and still rockin’ the funky, sparkly nails! Not only is it FUN, but then I don’t have to decide on just one awesome color! (You know us Libras, we can never make up our minds.)
2) If I grew up, I’d probably have to get a conservative hair-cut. And really? WHY would I EVER want to give up my anime piggy-tails? (You guessed it! The hairs have grown-out enough that the pixie-tails have returned! Woo Hoo!) Think about it, they’re cute, they’re whimsical, and when we go to the mall I’m the envy of every two and three year old in the place!
3) If I grew up, I’d have to get an entire new wardrobe! (See? Growing up would be WAY too expensive!) I’m fairly certain real grown-ups don’t have a closet full of Tinkerbell clothing. (I am NOT obsessed! Most of them were gifts…)
The Family Guy, The Simpson’s, and my wide selection of Super Hero shirts would probably need to disappear as well. *sigh* I just don’t think I could live that way…My soul? Would simply die. (No, I am not being a Drama Queen!)
4) If I grew up, I’d have to start speaking (and probably writing) like an adult. All of my “colorful” language and inventive, made-up words would have to be eliminated. And I don't think adults insert “awesome” and “totally” into every friggin’ sentence either! (Oh yeah, “friggin,” “flippin’,” and “freakin;” would no longer get to be included either. How boring is THAT!?!)
I would also be required to speak in complete sentences and encouraged to avoid the use of my hands for emphasis. In other words? I’m end up completely SILENT!
|How could I trade this bit of|
awesomeness for sensible flats?
5) If I grew up, there would be no more tantrums, foot stomps, or squealing when I didn’t get my way. And I ask you this, people? If I gave up the tantrums, how would anyone ever know when they did something to displease me? Because you know, being the Queen of the House and all, MY pleasure is of the upmost importance! (Remember, if Momma ain’t happy, ain’t NOBODY happy!)
6) If I grew up, I’d have to eat real breakfast food for breakfast. You know, the stuff with all the fiber and no colorful sugar coating? No fun shapes? No prize in the box! No more Extreme Dill Pringles or Hersey’s Chocolate for breakfast…Who would want to live like that? *deeply troubled sigh*
7) If I grew up, I would have to learn to act like a “Lady.” No more big, belly laughs so loud that the entire room turns to look at me. No more kicking my shoes off at restaurants and sitting cross-legged at the table. No more belching contests…(I have to stop now, I’m scaring the crap outta myself!)
8) If I grew up, I would never again be allowed to skip or bunny hop at the store when I‘m bored. (OK, I can’t really skip anymore, but I can still bunny hop like a freakin’ CHAMP!) Also? No more wandering the toy aisles when hubby isn’t looking. (Since, ya know…the toys I’m playing with are for me…I cannot wait for Grand kids so I’ll once again have a legitimate excuse to play in the toys!)
9) If I grew up, I’d be forced to give up my dream of running away with the Gypsies. Also, my dreams of being a ballerina would probably be laid to rest. (Hey, it could happen! You just never know…)
Adults dream of things like a new car with low interest, NOT of brightly painted wagons pulled by pretty horses. They dream of fixed-rate mortgages, not pink lace tutu’s and satin slippers…(BORE-ING!)
And last, but oh so not least…
10) I don’t wanna grow up, ‘cause if I did, I wouldn’t be a Toys R Us kid! *falls over on table in a fit of uncontrollable giggles*
|No more fairies with rainbow tutus?|
I just couldn't live that way!
And as for all of the actual grown-ups in the crowd? I love you and don’t EVER change! Because us immature, over-grown kids? We NEED you to keep things running smoothly and make sure we don’t do serious damage to ourselves or others with our lack-of-forethought and goofy hijinks!
Just remember guys, you need us too, to make you look all responsible and stuff and to keep your lives interesting and (hopefully) make you laugh!
May your day be filled with enough immaturity to remember to skip or bunny hop, a thought or two about pixie dust, and (as always) lots of big, LOUD belly-laughs!