I’d almost (almost, I say) gotten over the feeling that I had fallen asleep as “me” and awaken as a Spam-bot, somehow replaced during my innocent slumber by Aliens intent on repopulating Earth with annoying spam-belching internet hazards. Then, the “other stuff” began happening…
Before I begin my tale of tragedy and heartache, sure to leave you as terrified to return to your computer as “Jaws” left a Nation in regards to the water, let me make one thing clear…I like making new friends! Yep, Mister Rogers worked his magic on me. Friends are good. You know, silver and gold and all that. But, hidden deep within the well of friendship lays a deep, dark secret…More Aliens!
Bots…you guys know EXACTLY what I’m talking about! The Friends that tweet, post, and pin every 1.5 seconds, 24 hours a day! They post inspirational quotes, links, more links, best-of links, and tons of witty observations…every 1.5 seconds! 24 hours a day!
Now, I’m no expert, but I’m fairly certain few humans could maintain that type of schedule for any length of time. Nor could most mere mortals afford to pay others to sit at a keyboard and do it for them. Which in my book, only leaves one explanation, Alien Bots! (They’ve even gotten to my Grammar check, since any time I mention “Alien Bots” in a sentence, it’s telling me it’s WRONG! Darn you Aliens! Darn you all to heck!)
It both frightens and confuses me…(not that it really takes much to confuse me, but that SO is not the point!) How do I know if I’m "chatting" with a real person? How do I know if I’m preparing to “follow” a bot? Is Social Media their way in, preparing Earth for their final invasion? Does the Military know about this? The Government? Should I tell them? Are they in cahoots with the Aliens?
Oh, the mental pain and anguish of it all!
(Sorry…kinda got a bit carried away right there. I’m OK now. I promise!) I do wonder, though, if this is the future of all on-line socialization. Will it devolve to nothing more than one Bot tweeting to another Bot who in turn follows another Bot that re-tweets the last Bot? Will there remain any actual humans reading this stuff who really care?
Does all this Bot-to-Bot communication really increase anyone’s on-line presence, or does it serve merely to annoy the shnikies outta the last remaining humans until they’re forced to un-follow just to get some peace and quiet on their pages?
I would LOVE to get your thoughts on this, since I have always assumed that on-line Social sites were for being social, not for being spam-blasted. (Yeah, yeah. I know already! Assume…ass of u and me…I got it…)
Or, and this is where my biggest fear lies, is it just me getting all the Bot-people…because I am, after all, a Spam-Bot!?! (And here I thought I was getting better at navigating the whole captcha thing!)
May your day be filled with the safe and secure knowledge that all your “interwebs” buddies are HUMAN, your “friends requests” be true, and any “followers” be pure of purpose! Oh, and may the “Force” of Spam-Filters be with you!