Cindy at Everyday Underwear is celebrating a Birthday today (Happy Birthday Lady!) and it got me to thinking…I wrote something two years ago when I was preparing to hit 40. (30? No problem! 40? THAT one freaked me out!) Out of a morbid sense of curiosity, I dug it out this morning…just because.
|Pixie at 40|
So, for all of us who occasionally freak about our age, I present for your morning giggle-pleasure “When I Am 40!”
Age is just a number and I’ve forgotten how to count! To hell with, “When I am old I shall wear purple….”I want a new mantra!
When I am 40, I shall misbehave!
I will laugh at inappropriate things at inappropriate times.
I will dance my way through Wal-Mart and fart freely as the mood
(and gas) takes me.
Then, I will smile widely as I blame it on my kids.
I will dye my hair unique colors and cut it in odd shapes,
refusing to follow the fashion of my age demographic.
I shall walk bare-foot through the park, cussing loudly
when I encounter dog poo between my toes.
Then, when my middle-aged bladder chooses, I shall pee on a tree…..
When I am 40 I shall listen to loud music from this decade and
dance around the house like a caffeine-stricken monkey!
If one of my kids films it and puts it on U-Tube, I shall find ways to
embarrass and harass him publicly for years to come!
(Yes, it happened!)
I shall paint my nails multiple colors WITH sparkles
and pretend that I am a Fairy Princess.
I shall show public displays of affection for my hubby,
and giggle when he pinches my tushy in the grocery store.
When I am 40 I shall give up the ghost on becoming a mature adult.
I shall laugh joyously when I look in the mirror
and see my mother looking back at me.
I shall continue to wear age-inappropriate clothing
and stick my tongue out at the teenagers in American Eagle!
I will pick the underwear out of my crack without care
and scratch when and where it itches. I will adjust my bra with zest
and laugh at the looks!
In short, when I am 40, I shall still be ME!
|Pixie turning 42...|
Still crazy after all these years!