A Gift From The Penniless Gods!

  Good morning! Sorry for the repeated absence this week. Let’s just say I’ve been dancing with The Flare the she can’t keep time or stay off my toes. But that’s cool, ‘cause I’m back and ready to kick butt! (Just as long as I can kick said butt from a lounging position of the couch!)
  First off, let me thank you guys! Someone somewhere nominated me for the
WEGO Hilarious Health Activists Award! Whoever you may be, you freakin’ ROCK!

  As a reward, they gave me a nifty little thingy to stick on my page. à I have NO IDEA what happens when you click on it…the whole blog may explode, a black hole may appear and transport you to an alternate universe, or it may take you to the Nomination Page
 so you can nominate someone else. IT’S A TOTAL MYSTERY!
  OK, moving on (yeah, I switch gears pretty fast after this much coffee) according to my calendar it’s Friday again. That must mean *drum roll* Top Ten time!

  This last week has been a rather tight financial stretch (yeah, I know you know what I’m talking about!) and it suddenly dawned on my yesterday as I was preparing delicious Ramen for lunch that I felt like I was back in college! After all, a lot of my survival skills for tight times were learned in those (I try desperately to make them) long forgotten days.

  So, this week’s list is all about ways to tell if you’re either a college student or chronically illin’!

     Top Ten Signs You’re Either a College Student or Have a Chronic Illness:
     1) Ramen Noodles. If you know more ways to prepare them other than the instructions on the package, you qualify!

Ramen. Enough said!

  (I am not ashamed to say I can make mac-and-cheese, spaghetti, alfredo dishes, and if you use sugar and cinnamon it can even be dessert! Side dish, main course, no problem! Ramen is like the cheap-o gift from the Penniless Gods!)

     2) Laundry. If you have ever purchased additional underwear or socks because it took less energy than washing the ones you already have, you qualify!
     3) Underwear. Conversely, if you own underwear that is made up of a band of elastic, a thread, and a prayer because you’re too poor to buy new ones? You qualify!
     4) Wardrobe. If more than 75% of your wardrobe consists of T-shirts, sweat pants, and men’s boxer-pants, you DEFINITEL qualify!
     5) (This one’s kinda a chick thing) Make-up. If you think of make-up mainly as what happens after you’ve have a tiff with your sweetie, you qualify.
     6) Shaving. If you wait until you (for the dudes) catch birds attempting to nest in your facial hair or you can’t find your mouth to eat…(for the gals) can’t put on a pair of pants because they Velcro to your legs when you attempt to pull them up…to shave, then you qualify.
     7) Drugs. This one’s kinda tricky, because one way is “experimental” for “expanding your mind.” The other is more “experimental” to control your malfunctioning bod. Either way, both usually involve LOTS of “experimentation!”
     8) Entertainment. If your main form of entertainment is endless TV while chiz-illin on the couch, you qualify.

I TOTALLY staged this shot.
I SWEAR!

     9) Caffeine. If you utilize excessive amounts of caffeine, either to cram for a big test you were too busy engaging in #8 to study for earlier or to combat the effects of the evil fatigue and brain fog monster, you SO qualify!
     10) Housework. If your house looks like it was the victim of a drive-by un-dusting, a paper bomb, or you have to move more than two items off any given surface before you can sit down, you most definitely qualify!
     This list is by no means all-inclusive. Got any I should have added? Lay ‘em on me, baby! (Sorry for the use of “baby.” Pain meds…*grin)