Good morning! OH-MY-GAWD! What in the nether-verse is going on with the invisible Gnomes that are apparently beating me with socks filled with large metal balls while I’m sleeping!?! Oh and it’s NOT just me! I’ve spoken to so many people this week that are either in serious, mucho pain or have been stricken down with a cold/evil virus of some unknown origin. UGH!
So, what do you do? You follow the “eat me” and “drink me” directions on the pretty little bottles and enter Wonderland. But wait, there’s more! (Yeah, just like a Ronco commercial.) After your brain enters Wonderland, your body is forced to carry on the day-to-day stuff without it.
And that’s where today’s Top Ten comes in. (Hey, it’s Friday. Ya KNEW it was coming!)
Top Ten Acts of WHAT!?! While My Brain Was Riding The Stupid Pills:
1) Elf Quest- The whole Elf on a Shelf things eludes me. My offspring are now old enough I use the standard threats-and-bribes method of bending them to my will. (When it starts working, I’ll let ya know.) Yet, the pics and prose in ode to these critters still abounds.
So I decided I wanted an Elf of my own so I didn’t miss out on all the photo ops. Only MINE was gonna be the Elf Without a Shelf- Homeless edition. And yes, I had all manner of ill intentions. I was going to do HORRIBLE things to him and take BAD pics to post for my own amusement, thus pissing off hoards of Elf devotees.
But alas…every damn store around is sold out of the happy little bugger. This means I simply wandered aimlessly through Target for 45 minutes while randomly chanting, “I want a damn Elf!” The Boy who was my “chaperone” for this trip? Was distinctly NOT amused!
But I was and that’s what really matters. Right? *grin*
(That one counts for three since I blew up the display in three different ways. Now THAT, my friends, is true talent!)
8) Point-And-Scream- I cannot believe I almost forgot this one! I DID find an Elf on a Shelf, but he was too busy being tortured to come home and “play” with me. And he had friends too. It was a veritable Holiday Horror Fest!
I weep still for their pain. *sniff sniff*
9) Medicated Media- I think we covered that one pretty thoroughly yesterday. Enough said. *grin*
10) Be Creative- Umm…ya see, I heard all the tales about the Disney Artists being jacked-up on coke when they created Fantasia. (And watching it stone-cold-sober, I can TOTALLY believe it!) So, I figured, “What the heck!” At least, I’m pretty sure that’s what I figured. It all kinda runs together after a certain point.
I’ve been doodling to have something to focus on besides aches and cussing like a sailor. My house is officially COVERED in these things right now. So, what do I do with them? I ended up re-tooling a site that was a brief foray into a joint-blog for me and The Girl. (She was easily bored. What can I say?) (And yeah, she’s gonna yell at me and say I was the one easily bored. To which I’ll reply, “Prove it!”)
Here’s hoping you’re having a totally pain-free day and more than a few giggles to keep you smiling!