Pointless With No Real Point…

This is what happens when you try to push the
“image capture” button with your toe.
(And ya know what? I am no where NEAR as limber as 
I used to be.)

  Good morning! I recently (as in last night) discovered that the Universe does in fact have me on a list. And probably not a very a good one.
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  Hubby woke with a splitting headache yesterday. OK, Indiana and bad sinuses go together like peanut butter and honey, so…(Yes, they DO in fact got together. Just try it!) Anyway, by some miracle I was still awake when he got home from work, so I did the wifely thing and waddle-limped over to kiss him. And he dodged me!
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  Fever, chills, all-over body aches…(Dear Virus guys, I know you’re having a blast mutating and playing dodge-ball with my family’s immune systems and stuff, but did you know there’s a great big world out there just WAITING to be infected? All you gotta do is LEAVE MY FAMILY ALONE! Thank you and have a delightful non-Dean day.)

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  OK, enough about another impending plague. (I’m sure I’ll whine more about it in a few days so this should hold you ‘til then.)
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  How about this week’s Top Ten? Because I awoke this morning to a house devoid of coffee (yes my friends, weep with me) I’m having focusing issues, so I’m gonna cheat.
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  The morning I had some form of out-of-mind/body experience and wrote the Twitter Soliloquy, I’d actually started off writing random Tweets that, in my humble opinion, were on par with much of what I’d seen clogging up my stream-thingy that morning.
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  So, I’m resurrecting those bizarre hash-tagged bits of flotsam and jetsam. (I have no idea, it just sounded good so I went with it.)
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     Top Ten Pointless Tweets That Will NEVER See The Light Of The Twitter Stream:
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     1) I am Jack’s sense of #RighteousIndignation towards the #bird who just stole the last bite of #Poptart outta my mouth. (23)

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     2) I am so far behind on EVERYTHING in my #life except the non-consequential stuff. I’m actually a week ahead on that. #Spaz (19)
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     3) I am NOT #OCD. For the love of all that is holy, put that shiz-nit in #AlphabeticalOrder. I’m #CDO! #contentment (27)

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     4) I #Tweet therefore I am…#bored and probably can’t survive without my #CellPhone in my hand. #annoyance (38)
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     5) Today is the 1st day of the rest of my #life. Basically the #meds make it hard to #remember much that happened before #yesterday. #BrainFog (0)
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     6) The #BlueBird of #Happiness is moonlighting for #Twitter. Does that mean Happiness isn’t worth much anymore? #curious #inflation (12)
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     7) I am Jack’s sense of #confusion over how the hell to capture a #CompleteThought in 140 characters or less. #Longwinded (22)
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     8) Why can’t I get any #OutOfWorkClowns or #DrunkMimes to #follow me? I feel so #unloved! #incomplete (42)

Yes, that is the Zombie-Chris doll
eating the Twitter Bird’s brains.
*grin*

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     9) If it wasn’t for #PopCulture references my #vocabulary would consist of four words, all of them #dirty. #Societal Mockingbird (15)
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     10) #Twitter is the #SecretWeapon of #BigBrother. #People are not only #encouraged to get all up in everyone’s shiz-nit but to post their own shiz-nit for the rest of the #world to get all up and in. That way? When #TheTimeIsRight, #assimilation into #TheCollective will be a cinch! (-141)
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  OK, I’m still working on #10, but you get the idea.


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