Tuesday, August 13, 2013

One BRIGHT, hot mess

  Good morning! I need a volunteer to throw me a surprise party. You know, one of the intervention themed ones where all my friends and family (and a few strangers who participate just so they can watch the train wreck that is me come the rest of the way unglued) band together and corner my crazy ass so they can convince me to STOP THE MADNESS? Yeah. One of THOSE.

  You may have noticed I’ve been screwing with things around here again. I am sort-of-somewhat-ashamed to admit it might have a teensy bit to do with the fact I’ve been reading “How To” books again. Like “How to pretend you’re blog’s all professional looking and stuff.”

  And I am failing miserably!

  But I swear, it’s not all my fault! It’s like the Universe conspired  to bring me to this point with a fatal sequence of events…

1) Gifted with weekend pass to BlogHer ‘13

2) Spend months losing my shit over attending this beast

3) Attend and make it out alive (despite the best efforts of the Chicago Cabbies)

4) Spend weeks pondering all the amazingly successful, professional, got-their-shit-together women met there

5) Spend weeks reading their blogs and weeping into morning coffee (hey, it dilutes the caffeine, which I’m supposed to be cutting back on) over how AWESOME their stuff looks and how UNawesome own looks

6) Spend weeks reading “how to look like you know what the hell you’re doing” books and blogs in an effort to fool people into believing I know what the hell I’m doing

7) Begin to read blog post on how to come up with the perfect business cards, only to glance at one of own and think, “Mine looks like one hot mess!

8) Lean back in chair and glance at all the “hard work” recently put in to latest attempts to “professional up” inerwebz home and think, “This looks like one BRIGHT, hot mess!

9) Begin to shake my fist at the Media Gods for their cruelty in passing over on the day they were handing out the mad sleek-and-professional-designing-skills.

10) Catch self at the last minute and realize that cards and interwebz home is an EXACT reflection of self…one bright, hot MESS!

11) Begin doing a seated “lop-sided happy dance” only to fall sideways outta chair because forgot legs were crossed.

  Yep. One HUGE bright, hot mess!

  Crisis averted, dreams of being all professional-like squashed, and intervention no longer needed. (Really guys. I’m OK. I can quit changing crap any time I want. REALLY! You can let go of my arms and give me the colored pencils and scanner back any time now…)

PS  After seeing several blogs with social media buttons that matched their header and lusting after my own one-of-a-kind set? I FINALLY found a friggin’ easy-peasy tutorial that was simple enough I could even follow it! If y’all wanna make your own buttons, check out Creating Social Media Icons to match Your Blog Theme at Julie DeNeen’s Fabulous Blogging

Set #1...epic fail! Lost ALL definition when shrunk.
Ya live, ya learn!